33 posts


I come through sand Reverberating with karmic potential   I come for the sun Rising from beyond the ocean   We are survivors of addiction A ruthless affliction Gathered to share our stories Staying clean one day at a time   Our disease is insidious Brutal and persistent   We […]


Viscous And vibrant Pulsating color a mirror   Reflecting the struggle of service Service to nation and principle Service to community and country   Layers of paint Explode like wildfire Live vivacious shrapnel Beautiful and resonant   Splatterings Of red, white, and blue Explosions of color like karmic chemistry   […]


I sit by the water—I came here to write….The river ebbs and flows and pulsates with energy…It reverberates with the power to sustain life and the power to take it… I came to write about my mind—to write about the social construct known as bipolar disorder…This diagnosis has been an […]


I am evolving and deepening my awareness… With the shackles of addiction in remission I live in gratitude and in joy… I live on the manic depressive spectrum—tending towards states of hypomania and mania… Eliminating the toxicity of substances of abuse has helped me stabilize, but the powers within that […]


Here I am: right were I need to be… This perfect June sky approaching sunset—delicate blues and pinks dancing in the stratosphere Dancing like we danced in the streets hours ago—celebrating the growing power of the struggle for trans and queer liberation…. This is my first fully clean Pride… The […]


I am a human being suffering from the human condition—I am psychosis and neurosis: I am mania and depression…I feel things to the bone and I seek the deepest truth—I imagine my tribe as a cyber-wired battalion of Jedi troops…I am not your poison—I am not psychically toxic…I register the […]

TRUTH SERUM: a journal entry

Last night, the moon communed with Jupiter—someone told me to ask for what I want because I just might get it…with synapses firing at speeds faster than light, I asked for insight and foresight—I asked for knowledge of my noble purpose… today, I had a soul to soul convergence with […]


your eyes make me smile and your hips make me wild—this hard house pulsation leaves me hot, hung, and wired…erotic reverberations stomp, grind, and fly—you are showing me your divine spark, your chakras, and your third eye… i seek the guidance of my higher power and shed the illusion of […]


limp wrists and raised fists—trans and queer we rearm and resist…we harness sacred powers arising in our midst—magical elixirs find their way to our souls through our lips…emphatic euphoric and intensely orgasmic—the confluence of emotion is deep and hypnotic…our dance with the dialectic is fierce and jaw dropping—our energy expands […]


my mind reverberates at hypomanic speed to the rhythms of the flickering flames–seven multicolored pillars of fire surround my sacred circle of evolving recovery arising untamed… this monument to the pyromanic is made of the vestiges of dozens of votives…i summon powers of magical incantation from a pantheon of sacred […]


manic zen from deep within fusing sin with oxygen–possibilities writhe and morph revealing potent visions usually accessed psychedelically…i have seen vivid fractals unfolding before my closed eyes…i have felt tantric erotic power erupting deep inside… in this wretched moment civilization is at stake–but i am removed from the world of […]


  this is a poem about recovery–a poem as metaphor for my journey towards synchronicity with my higher power…none of us created the scaffolding of the 12-step universe–no one created it because we co-created as a decentralized collective building on the insights of those who came before…and we continually create […]


there is subterranean strength in your body and volcanic energy in your mind–this is a seismic cosmic moment when everything that happens is a sacred sign…we craft an epitaph for this system etched in rage, blood, and pride–i give in to my higher power and seek a creative serenity deep […]


I am proud of how i show up for life on the manic depressive spectrum–i am proud of my creativity and empathy, and of my spiritual insights and practice…i resist the dogma that calls all of this a disorder, because when balanced, my neurodivergent mind is opened to inspiration that […]


light and sound become energized and fused into one–we see fractals in the moon and volcanic power in the sun…psychedelic synergy has transformed who we are and what we can become–we project universal liberation as the cosmic project that is to be done…i have learned that i do not need […]


i am only forty-one, but addiction has been a cunning enemy of my life for at least three decades…at first compulsive sexual stimulation and fantasy–but also a foundational addiction to the power of intellect and self will…while my head branded me an atheist, my heart and soul kept me connected […]


in your eyes is placed a power greater than all of their hoarded gold–your eyes are wormholes to a future of humility and grace so deeply rooted that its seeds will grow…we build power and resilience to feed the richness of our souls–we have so many toxic patterns and toxic […]


here i am–humbly and blissfully imperfect–reckoning with harm i have caused by striving to be accountable and doing work to transform…i am decentering self–dismantling the illusion of my willful power to control the world around me…this is my attempt at surrender–and her matrix of liberation is opening new vistas of […]


I feel alone–so painfully alone… Lost in a fog of fear, profound remorse, and omnipresent anxiety… My mind has been locked in a vicious cycle of FIGHT, FLIGHT, or FREEZE–a cycle only broken by cathartic tears of pain… I have been confronted in retrograde by a new landscape of harm–this […]


living in luminous sobriety is its own sacred high–we must craft a healing revolution to sanctify our hearts and minds…the oxygen, dopamine, and adrenaline make me wild and super fly–i am done being a spice junkie constantly lost in the ebb and flow of time…i saw visceral visions as i […]


you activate my visions and animate my mind–but your hallucinogenic powers leave toxicity behind…i reach for you out of habit hoping to play with time–i reach for you seeking a key to the magic arising from deep inside…this is dirty medicine flowing freely conjured to fuel my fire–i must summon […]


alcohol and adderall—smoking up like biggy smalls…toxic habits haunt us all—we crave the things that make us fall…lines of coke fueling pychotic breaks—giving less than I fight to take…forgetting how much I have at stake—living in sin is make or break…sex with meth and sex on speed—finding pleasure too intense […]

FINE LINES: an aspirational manifesto for mental health liberation

like angels, we seek signs of evolving life at the end of the dank, dark, and isolating depressive tunnel like aztec warriors, monster queer muslim and sephardic cylon buddhas resist the proto-fascist cop-enforced kettle we seek solidarity and transcendent love: our sharpest tools in the quest to conquer our past […]

BAD BOY: a retro riff

bad boy drunk by six—kissing some fly stranger’s lips…smoked too many cigarettes today—i’m not happy when i act this way… high on life but stoned on speed—totally consumed by carnal needs…praying for justice and fighting for peace—seducing disciples and seeking relief… black cat nine lives—short days long nights…dancing on the […]

FINDING NEO: a prayer for our living gods

the night is pregnant with possibilities aroused and penetrated by my manic brain…the joy is punctuated with urgency—and i am anything but insane..we are organizing with all our strength to uproot a totalitarian regime—we are fighting to amplify our many struggles using all of our arsenal deployed by any means…my […]

FOREVER TONIGHT: an anthem of liberation

electrified by the moon and intoxicated by the stars—i seek fellow travelers in electric clubs and hipster bars…i want forever tonight—i want it deep in my soul—i will accrue passing years but i will never grow old…the future of our tribe  lies with the nascent generations arising—we fight for liberation […]