Category: mental health

STIGMA

STIGMA

I am proud of how i show up for life on the manic depressive spectrum–i am proud of my creativity and empathy, and of my spiritual insights and practice…i resist the dogma that calls all of this a disorder, because when balanced, my neurodivergent mind is opened to inspiration that is both ecstatic and grounded…at …

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CUNNING ENEMY

CUNNING ENEMY

i am only forty-one, but addiction has been a cunning enemy of my life for at least three decades…at first compulsive sexual stimulation and fantasy–but also a foundational addiction to the power of intellect and self will…while my head branded me an atheist, my heart and soul kept me connected to the potent synergy of …

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GESTATION: diary of a shadow worker

GESTATION: diary of a shadow worker

I want to write about who I am becoming—and about what I am leaving behind…I want to write about the web we are weaving to save the air we are breathing with the power of our minds…I am a shadow worker in gestation—seeing the cracks through which liberation comes…pouring libations and releasing incantations to channel …

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PERDIDO

PERDIDO

I feel alone–so painfully alone… Lost in a fog of fear, profound remorse, and omnipresent anxiety… My mind has been locked in a vicious cycle of FIGHT, FLIGHT, or FREEZE–a cycle only broken by cathartic tears of pain… I have been confronted in retrograde by a new landscape of harm–this both tortures my conscience and …

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EROTIC AND PLATONIC

EROTIC AND PLATONIC

Our vibe is subtle, electric, and wild Your warmth is deeply attractive and your charms make me smile You are an ancient people’s warrior king and a cybernetic genius’ child We are bonded by the related demons that teem within our minds We have shared common struggles and bared vulnerable souls We seek symbiotic resilience …

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DIRTY MEDICINE

DIRTY MEDICINE

you activate my visions and animate my mind–but your hallucinogenic powers leave toxicity behind…i reach for you out of habit hoping to play with time–i reach for you seeking a key to the magic arising from deep inside…this is dirty medicine flowing freely conjured to fuel my fire–i must summon the power of breath to …

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SACRED PENETRATION

SACRED PENETRATION

you penetrate my heart–you penetrate my mind…you amplify my spirit leaving angels to frolic deep inside…the rhythms of my psyche are modulated by your eyes…we build rebellions to transform our world into a better child of our hybrid minds…sex can transport us to sacred places and transformational spaces…it can be a glue that binds exponentially …

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BLACK PHALANX

BLACK PHALANX

black men are fucking beautiful–and it hurts me that sometimes i don’t see that…i was born to a black mother and a white father, with tons of white cousins but none on my mother’s side…so that and systemic toxicity combined so that while only 8 or so i learned how to hold my lips pursed …

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PHOENIX TESTAMENT

PHOENIX TESTAMENT

layers of truth emerge in our minds where they refract and manifest—we are watching new dimensions come into being, metamorph, and coalesce…our psychic strength is evolving in synchronicity with our grounding intentional breath…we must be still and hone our powers to have a prayer of uprooting this cult of death…my manic mind seeks cosmic meaning …

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PYRAMIDS OF KHAN

PYRAMIDS OF KHAN

Refracting through my month of visions has been a vast pyramid with a maze underneath—its enclaves house nascent spirits arising from the magical deep…I am a disciple of emergent strategy as I have become a disciple of sleep—I recruit an army of freedom fighters to evict our rulers from their ruthlessly despotic keep We cannot …

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METAFRACTALS

METAFRACTALS

visions this intense have never before penetrated my mind—i see with godlike vision peering through amplified love fueled eyes…fractals manifest everywhere conveying prophecies for our disciples to find—this spiritual and erotic armor prepares us to leave the toxicity of this system behind…i am ripening through so much beauty and experiencing so much growth—i pray that …

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SUBLIME

SUBLIME

i am so wired for you pixie angel—it is visceral and it is magic…my heart is opening but fearing danger—we craft a connection that is free, seductive, and emphatic you take me to our own private nirvana—where agents of karma vogue with gaga and madonna…covered in platinum armor we strut ever harder—demanding justice for our …

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BLOOD WOLF MOON

BLOOD WOLF MOON

our world is in the throes of a collective spiritual rebirth—rebel armies conjuring godlings to imagine a sustainable place on this earth…the blood wolf moon brought karmic energy with love and rage interspersed—we are crafting our own destiny shaping emergent transformation that cannot be reversed…our new astrology posits that we are all fractals wired to …

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EUPHORIA: a bypo pixie duet

EUPHORIA: a bypo pixie duet

cosmological forces conjure elixirs for our sacred apothecary…jedi powers rise up fueled by love arming us to do what is necessary…enshrouded in beauty of soul and mind you tantalize with seductive eyes…this passion is expanding exponentially awakening a global karmic fire you receive me from my travels wearing fur and bearing gifts…as we settle in …

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TOXIC ENIGMA

TOXIC ENIGMA

alcohol and adderall—smoking up like biggy smalls…toxic habits haunt us all—we crave the things that make us fall…lines of coke fueling pychotic breaks—giving less than I fight to take…forgetting how much I have at stake—living in sin is make or break…sex with meth and sex on speed—finding pleasure too intense to believe…portals opening to new …

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YEAR OF PIXIE: AGE OF PHOENIX

YEAR OF PIXIE: AGE OF PHOENIX

  we are two but we are one–karmic angels worshipping the moon and sun…we are moses and abraham’s great grandsons–we imagine the nascent godlings we strive to become…destiny and fate drew our paths together–our lives will meet their end but our souls will live forever…craving a future changed decisively for the better–praying for the power …

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RIPENING: new rules for a new religion

RIPENING: new rules for a new religion

I write because I have to—I write because I have something to say…I create because I have the right to—I imagine a world crafted by wholistic ways…my mind reinspired by the solstice, I imagine a new multifaceted matrix…clothed in technicolor aspirations I arise from the ashes of the past like a phoenix…breathe slowly and intentionally …

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LOVE SONG #5: the blue ocean floor refrain

LOVE SONG #5: the blue ocean floor refrain

frequencies so low—heart on a string—a string that only plays solos…rain made of echoes—tidal wave rushing on and on… mood and emotion flow towards manic zen—eros and pathos surge from deep within…I long for your touch and for my heartbeat to pulsate again—I dream of your pixie magic interbreeding with my sixth sense… my eyes …

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LOVE SONG #4: the kygo suite

LOVE SONG #4: the kygo suite

baby it hit so hard, I’m holding on to my chest–maybe you left your mark, reminding me to forget…it doesn’t matter where you are, you can keep my regret…baby I got these scars, reminding me to forget–you left your mark reminding me to forget the pain of our past weighs like a nightmare on our …

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LOVE SONG #3: the ‘like a prayer’ riff

LOVE SONG #3: the ‘like a prayer’ riff

when you call my name its like a little prayer—I’m down on my knees, I want to take you there…in the midnight hour i can feel your power—just like a prayer you know i’ll take you there just like a voice, just like a dream—your eyes are so deep, so intoxicating for me…i feel your …

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